Occupying my future, reclaiming my past!

Asserting that ‘we are everywhere’ is probably more convincing than the claim that ‘I am everywhere”. Nonetheless it doesn’t take much suspension of disbelief before I’m able to convince myself that indeed “I am everywhere” – after all, I’ve been billing myself as ‘an ego maniac on a world historical scale’ for years! Recently I stumbled upon someone on Goodreads with my name who has been promoting my books rather energetically over there – unfortunately this Stewart Home can’t possibly be me since he joined the site in July 2007 (whereas I joined yesterday) and he’s based in the USA. My author profile at Goodreads is here.

When I read what other people write about me it can often seem like I’ve been even busier than I actually am. Reviewing my recent White Columns show in the New York Times on on 18 November, Roberta Smith wrote: “A brochure written by Mr. Home explains a lot, if not everything. For that, there is his lavishly detailed Wikipedia entry, which also appears to be his handiwork.” To me the entry in question has an inconsistency which makes it obvious it is a collective effort rather than mine. I suspect that some of the imbalances in the article are the result of other people using Wikipedia to promote themselves. For example, while many of my books and exhibitions are passed over without discussion, there is a bizarre passage about the Evening Falls nightclub (including the fallacious claim that I didn’t read there). Likewise, when I last checked, no one had updated my list of exhibitions on this Wikipedia page to include my recent White Columns outing.

Moving on, I’ve also seen some nutjob using web 2.0 comment facilities to allege that I write my own Amazon reviews…. of course they offered no proof, and had obviously missed the fact that I just don’t take the user generated content on that site very seriously. As you’ve probably gathered by now, way too many of my leisure hours are spent reading about myself for me to have the time to write reviews of my own books for Amazon. Likewise, it will come as little surprise to most of my readers that one of the things I love about the web is the way it allows everyone to turn over their own past – and in some cases rediscover material they’d pretty much forgotten. I didn’t have any images of the Anon exhibition I’d been a part of in Luton back in 1989 until John Wynne posted some photographs of it on his Facebook profile. I immediately snaffled those featuring my contributions and added them to my Flickr photostream – where they look absolutely fantastic in an utterly weird eighties appropriated post-pop art kind of way. Likewise, earlier this year I finally got around to putting an image of my ‘original’ Art Strike Bed onto Flickr, done several years before Tracey Emin attempted to recuperate this particular assault of mine on the sensibilities of the London art establishment.

I could use this piece as an opportunity to write about how I’m attempting to replace the planking fad with a craze for photos of people standing on their head – there are currently a dozen pictures of me doing headstands on my Flickr profile (see if you can find them all). However, rather than banging on about my topsy-turvy online presence, I’m now going to get even more self-referential and obsessive. What I’d like readers of this blog to do is tell me in the comments below whether I used the best possible title for this post, or whether I should have reversed it so that it ran: “Reclaiming my future, occupying my past”?

And while you’re at it don’t forget to check – www.stewarthomesociety.org – you know it makes (no) sense!

About mistertrippy

Stewart Home was born in south London in 1962. His mother Julia Callan-Thompson was a showgirl and club hostess. He has never held down a regular job for more than a few months at a time. On those rare occasions when he's been forced to work, Home has taken employment as a factory labourer, agricultural labourer, shop assistant, office clerk and art class model. Deciding he didn't like working in factories as a teenager, Home pursued cultural and political interests, writing many books and participating in even more gallery exhibitions.
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27 thoughts on “Occupying my future, reclaiming my past!

  1. Tom McGlynn says:

    If others want to cover your tracks Stewart, I say let ’em. As long as you stay one step beyond. The future is ours to remake!

  2. mistertrippy says:

    Yes indeed, time to reverse out of the past and let something else unfold!

  3. Nick Papadimitriou says:

    Nothing is wasted in the economy of ideas – particularly when they’re ideas we have about ourselves.

  4. I’ve only been Stewart Home since August 2007… I’ve no idea who the Goodreads impostor is!

  5. raymond anderson says:

    Past my reclaiming, future my occupying!

  6. mistertrippy says:

    Ray – can you run that by me again in various permutations and in past, present and future tense?

    @ Christopher Nosnibor – I can’t remember when I became Stewart Home – but I’m pretty sure I’m not Tony White the actor hired to play him….

    @ Nick Papadimitriou – The only ideas I have about myself are the ones I get from other people – and they’re all good (even when theyr’e bad)….

  7. Obviously you used the best version of the slogan as your title, and saved the inferior variation to ask a rhetorical question at the end. It seems you were asking for this kind of reply… or were you?

  8. Lucy Gordon says:

    The title is sweet but The Tower & The Hanged Man would have been better….

  9. Stewart Home says:

    Occupy your Present in order to Reclaim your Past and your Future
    Reclaim your Future Occupy your Present and Destroy your Past
    Destroy your Future Reclaim your Present and Occupy your Past
    Strike your Future Occupy your Past and Reclaim your Future
    Fuck your Present Fuck your Past and Fuck your Future
    Reclaim your Present in order to Occupy your Past and your Future
    Space your Future Time your Past and Class your Future
    Taste your Future Feel your Present Smell your Past
    See your Present Think your Future and Hear your Past

  10. Reclaim the past? Cock! I’m reclaiming my manhood!

  11. Maybe it could have been called ‘My circumferential pygmy gun? ’tis a coup’

    Thus spake Zarathustra

  12. Russell Brand is a 21st century sex god would have been even better!

  13. Sex Addict says:

    I am everywhere – ask your girlfriend!

  14. Katy Perry says:

    Forget the future – reclaim your own asshole now!

  15. Peter Pan says:

    The future is where you go when you get old – and that’s not somewhere I want to be!

  16. Tommy Cooper says:

    I think you should have used the title “My one-eyed trouser snake can perform magic tricks!”, because just like that it would have pulled in more readers than the rather staid headline your’ve got.

  17. Ginger Spice says:

    I quite like the one you used but you could have improved it by adding “by making it red” to the end of the title…

  18. What about “The future is occupation, you can’t reclaim the past”?

  19. Simon Strong says:

    How do you think I feel!? I’ve lost count of the number of people who’ve told me they thought that Stewart made me up!

  20. Could you have fitted ‘occupy my arse’ in there somewhere? Oh I can just go and add that into your wiki entry and attribute it to you anyway.

    I often get accused of being Mark Simpson, as I energetically promote his work. I have never actually pretended to be him though.

    I think it’s nice if people are taking on your name/persona and using it to talk about your work positively.

    I’ll go and look at ‘Stewart Home’s goodreads page, see if I can finally get hold of one of his/your books.

    Seasons Greetings

    Quiet Riot Girl
    http://www.quietgirlriot.wordpress.com
    http://www.deathatthemall.wordpress.com

  21. mistertrippy says:

    Yes definitely ‘occupy your arse’ could have helped with the hits – all occupy mentions do right now…. We just had the comment above about ‘reclaim your asshole’ – meaning in this instance, I presume, Russell Brand.

    I’d have to go check to be 100 percent sure but I’m convinced Mark Simpson (assuming you mean the British writer of that name) gave my second novel Defiant Pose a real stinker of a review (but then I like those anyway – I just count the column inches) twenty years ago… but subsequently gave me at least one very nice and positive reivew (and I think more than just one – although maybe the other stuff was mentions rather than reviews). Have a great 2012 – it’s after the end of the world!

    @ Simon Strong – but you’re still a cult legend. I guess ‘underground’ is your middle name. And I’ve read all your books and so have several others I know!

  22. Mark Simpson was probably just jealous he can’t do fiction. Though I think some of his essays start to take on a fictional narrative, if only he’d let himself go…

    Let me know if you find any reviews by him (yep the Brit writer, author of Anti Gay etc).

    I’m currently writing a book based largely on his work so any input is welcome:

    http://www.deathatthemall.wordpress.com

    Best,

    QRG

  23. Michael Roth says:

    I’ve corresponded with Tony White on several occasions and found him to be quite a decent chap. But I always assumed “Stewart Home” was a computer program / spam bot which auto-generated content. Am I wrong?

  24. mistertrippy says:

    Are you right or are you right? Or is that a rhetorical question?

  25. Elron Hubbard says:

    Stewart Home is Boring