10 Reasons Not To Blog

  1. These days most of those surfing the web prefer reading status updates to blogs – it takes less time.
  2. You can’t see the trees because of the astroturf. Likewise, you’ll get way more link spam than comments from people who’ve actually read your content.
  3. If you write something over 800 words in length virtually no one will reach the end.
  4. To get a point across you have to keep repeating it, which is boring after a while.
  5. No one is interested in what you’ve got to say – not even your mom (although she’ll be monitoring your web activity because she suspects you’re taking drugs and wants ‘proof’ before she confronts you about it).
  6. People are conditioned for instant gratification and just click through to a new page every few seconds.
  7. Technorati really sucks – the rss feeds they take from blogs like this get screwed around at their end and the posts don’t show up on their site.
  8. No one trusts the views of bloggers because of the way PR companies have attempted to manipulate this medium.
  9. Sometimes it’s really difficult to even think of ten points to create a formula blog, and you waste an hour on a post instead of getting it done in five minutes.
  10. Blogs have gone out of fashion because they are like so noughties.
    And while you’re at it don’t forget to check – www.stewarthomesociety.org – you know it makes (no) sense!


Comment by mistertrippy on 2011-10-16 13:32:31 +0000

And I could add I’m going to New York tomorrow so probably won’t have time to check in here until I’m back……

Comment by The Joker on 2011-10-16 14:30:12 +0000

& I just can’t be bothered to think of & then list 10 reasons not to leave a comment…..

Comment by Gold Lamé Fox on 2011-10-16 14:58:42 +0000

Q. Best man or boyfriend?
A. No comment!

Comment by Victoria B. on 2011-10-16 15:26:03 +0000

Since I don’t blog this post isn’t much use to me – next time could you please save me a fortune by covering 10 really good reasons not to shop…….

Comment by Owen Evans on 2011-10-16 17:48:33 +0000

What about 10 reasons not to read your blog for a post that is truly postmodern & completely self-referential!!!!!!!!!

Comment by Petteri Paksuniemi on 2011-10-16 18:24:20 +0000

All bloggers are wankers!

Comment by Andrew McK on 2011-10-16 18:36:34 +0000

You should try having a conversation with the junk mailers. My friend, and Nubian Princess, Cleo Nefrititi, is such a sweet old man.

Comment by Aye Eye on 2011-10-16 18:38:34 +0000

You truly are a proletariat comedian. Love it! A James Joyce with witticism.

Comment by Bruce Chatwin on 2011-10-16 19:49:47 +0000

I was a 42nd Street crack ho until I taught myself to blog….

Comment by Michael Farmer on 2011-10-16 20:43:31 +0000

I rather like scrambled blogs myself. I don’t mind ’em fried either. But I don’t do boiled or poached!

Comment by Alex Belle on 2011-10-16 21:33:53 +0000

Even sex blogs no longer appeal to the general public. They don’t want words or even words and pictures… they just want amateur porn star videos from outlets like RedTube…..

Comment by Bob The Blogger! on 2011-10-16 22:00:01 +0000

I really liked point 7 – Technorati really sucks!

Comment by raymond anderson on 2011-10-16 22:23:43 +0000

Can you send technorati round to my house please. I am feeling all MANLY!

Comment by Sarcastic Orgasm on 2011-10-16 22:39:01 +0000

I liked point 11 best – the one you didn’t get to….. and Technorati don’t so much suck as stink!

Comment by Stephen Burden on 2011-10-16 23:10:37 +0000

I agree with point 1 – and so you might as well do away with the post and just have the comments, or at least those that are as short as status updates!

Comment by Michael Roth on 2011-10-17 00:48:08 +0000

I’m sorry. I could not get past point #3.

Comment by Cesar A. Romero on 2011-10-17 06:45:35 +0000

Compared to Wikileaks some ordinary joe’s opinions are generally pretty lame.

Comment by Web 2.0 Games Freak on 2011-10-17 07:21:47 +0000

Would you rather post one or two blogs a week, or have your private sex videos leaked on the internet?

Comment by mistertrippy on 2011-10-17 11:37:01 +0000

Since I don’t have any private sex videos to be leaked on the internet I’m not really being offered a choice here – but if some of you wanna help me rectify this situation then there is a contact form on the main part of this website.
@ Raymond Anderson – I don’t think Technorati are manly enough to go round to your house without some serious pressure being applied to them. But thanks!
@ Michael Roth – see I said people couldn’t be bothered to read blogs any more and you just proved my point! Thanks!

Comment by The Yellow Door on 2011-10-17 12:30:26 +0000

Every blogger I’ve ever met in the flesh has turned out to be a jive ass mf!

Comment by Motorcyclist on 2011-10-17 20:05:36 +0000

I only post on blogs to pass secret codes to the aliens…..Annuniki note:)*)(*)(*&&(*)_
Loosely translated, it means “DUCK!”

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